Yesterday I wrote a letter to the editor, from my heart, knowing I was simply putting into words what so many are feeling.  That it is our own country that is sick to protect and defend the right to create and sell and carry and use weapons, even collect them as a curiosity.  And that one way to remember and honor those beautiful brave people who died is to address our illness, get needed treatment, and turn the health of this nation around.

Today, I had a thought that may not be on everyone's minds.  I pictured the shooter, fourteen years ago, when he was six years old.  I pictured his photo online for us to see.  I pictured an innocent child waiting, hoping, expecting to grow up into a creative constructive caring adult.  Obviously he was disappointed to the point of inconceivable rage and actions.

I am thinking of the thirty years of classes of five and six year olds, and some seven and eight year olds that I have taught in the public schools.  How every one of them was seen as innocent, and simply needing some guidance sometimes when the way got bumpy.  Mostly they needed to know that they were cool, just the way they were; that they were wanted and enjoyed as contributing members of the class.

I don't know what happened in this young man's life to lead him to this outrageous idea of random murder of innocents. I do know that in many years of his education our nation has turned to an extreme degree of testing. Years ago I, with many other caring teachers, seriously questioned this strategy of "improving our schools."  The powers that be bulldozed their agendas right down the throats of our nation and now public schools are held captive for funding to The Test. I believe our schools were doing a good job until they got handicapped by the re-direction of funding into the testing machine.  Now many many schools are struggling because the funds are difficult to maintain reasonably sized classes and the creative arts.  Not as much time can be spent encouraging individual creativity---they all HAVE to measure up on the test.

Our schools are quite good, and have been for many years.  Look at how many students from other countries strive to come here for college.  That wouldn't be true if the foundation of our education---the public schools---were not doing a strong job. But I do agree, we can always do better.

And by golly, Finland does better!! Their schools are the best in the world in achievment. Not by losing resources and teaching time through testing.   They don't even start school until 7 years old, allowing their youngsters a chance to explore and play before they ever enter a classroom and start being evaluated.  They give equal resources to all their public schools, so they all have all the academic subjects and all the speicals of art and music and gum. They get an hour of recess a day---work hard, play hard, have strong bodies and strong minds.   These are not new ideas but somehow our leaders forgot.  And yes, their teachers are paid at professional levels comparable to doctors and lawyers.

Are they worth it. Yes.  Yes. Yes.  They are there, every day with every child helping them to grow into all they can be.  Every every single child grows up to be an adult.  May they be loved and nurtured all the way.

Between our availability of guns and the stresses of schools, we do not have a good track record for student safety and well-being.  According the the web site "Stoptheshootings.org" there have been 386 school shootings since 1992. They state that "children ages 5-14 in America are 13 times more likely to be murdered with guns as children in other industrialized nations." According to the Gale Encyclopedia of Education in an article titled "Testing: A Short History of High-Stakes" "standards-based reforms began in the 1990's.  Hmmm....In Finland I could only find two school shootings.  Hmmm...compared to 386 here.

Last Friday was a tragic day that we want to believe was a random bizarre reaction to some trigger that had nothing to do with us.  But, just in case it wasn't so random, and just in case the schools, which I love with all my heart, had some piece of the puzzle, maybe we should take a look at the long-term results of too much evaluation and cookie cutter goals and not enough appreciation of every child's unique gifts and potential, in diverse areas.  We are not all made the same.  We never have been and we never will be.  We bring different gifts to this gift called life.